Italian Mother Hens
by EvilxPineapple
Summary: When the 'Bad Touch Trio' pass out after a night of drinking and leave the house in chaos, Lovino takes it apon himself to set things straight.


_Own Hetalia I do not. Wish I did I do. Lieing I am. Screw it up I would. Having too much fun with this I am. _

It was quiet when Lovino woke up, which was actually strange. Seeing as when he had gone to sleep the Bad Touch Trio were down stairs drinking like no tomorrow, he had expected to wake up to complete turmoil. Everyone knew the Bad Touch Trio plus alcohol equaled chaos. With a small grunt Lovino turned his head to look at the clock. The glowing red number read 2:30. That was strange, most of the time the trio drank until 3. They much must have gotten wasted faster than usual.

Lovino blinked the sleep out of his eyes as he slowly sat up. The blanket slipped off his shoulders, letting the cold air hit his skin. He cringed as a shiver ran down his back. For a quick second Romano thought about snuggling into the toasty blankets and going back to sleep. It would be so much better than getting up. He automatically pushed the thought away. Besides, even if he did snuggle back into his bed he wouldn't be able to sleep. The thought would haunt him until he got up and did it. Lovino let out a silent sigh. He pushed the rest of his covers off, shivering at the sudden change in temperature. Slowly he got out of his bed. The hiss he made when his feet hit the freezing wood floor seemed out of place in the silent air. Finally Lovino stood up, his normal scowl already in place. He stretched a bit, loosening some kinks, before he decided he should probably put some pants on.

When mostly clothed, he crept out of his room. Lovino's bare feet padded silently against the floor as he sneaked down the halls of Antonio's large house. He sent a fierce glare to the stairs in front of him, as if daring the steps to make a single noise when he stepped on them. Fortunately, for both Lovino and the stairs, the trip down was soundless. Now that he was on the same floor as the trio Lovino had to be more careful. His ears strained to hear any sign of noise that would come from the trio. But no, the house might as well have been empty. Lovino eased up a bit but still remained cautious, there was no way this would work if they saw him.

All of Lovino's suspicions were quickly put to rest when he made it to the living room. All three members of the Bad Touch Trio, Francis, Gilbert, and Antonio, were passed out on the ground in what had to be uncomfortable positions. Francis was half lying on a bed of wine bottle, with one foot hanging off the arm of the couch. Gilbert was on the coffee table, his head dangling on one side and his legs on the other, making some sort of strange back bend. Antonio was on the couch. Well, his face was. The rest of him was sprawled out on the ground with his body twisted in strange positions. Lovino scoffed at the idiocy but was relieved for their lack of consciousness. For Lovi knew that once the trio fell asleep, especially after a night of drinking, nothing could wake them. His relief quickly turned to pure rage when he saw the state of the living room.

It was a mess. Beer cans, wine bottles, shot glasses and other things Lovino really didn't want to think about littered the ground, most of them still having alcohol in them that were now dripping of the floor. They would definitely leave stains. They had broken the lamp, again. They had for some reason flipped the chair over and stacked all of the pillows and blankets on it. And Lovino didn't even know how they managed to turn the curtain purple. The Italian groaned. He better do this quick, or it was going to be a long night. Lovino hurriedly walked to the closet. He opened the door and pulled out some garbage bags, chemicals, and an apron. He went back to the trashed room, scowled, and tied the apron on.

Then Lovino began to clean.

What? Lovino could clean if he wanted. It was a perfectly manly think to do. And it wasn't like he could leave it to those idiots to clean the room; they'd probably make a bigger mess. And if he left the alcohol set any longer it would stain even worse. And what if one of them turned over and landed on a broken glass or something. They could get hurt. But it wasn't like Lovino cared about them or something; he just didn't want to clean up their blood. They could go crawl in a hole and die for all he cared.

Lovino surveyed the room listing what he had to do. Well, first he should get Antonio, Gilbert, and Francis out of those uncomfortable positions and on to the couch. Wait! He, he meant get the idiot trio out of the way. And, that he might as well put them on the couch. Lovi fought down a blush and went over to the sofa. He began to pick up the bottles; he separated them into categories, put them all in bags, and then stuffed them in the closet. He could recycle the cans tomorrow. With the couch clear of bottles he could now see the numerous alcohol stains. Lovino clenched his fist and glared at the sleeping idiots. If they weren't passed out he would kill them. After glaring at them for a few more seconds he shook his head and rolled his eyes. Lovi grabbed a rag and the cleaning chemicals and made quick work of the stains.

"Ha! take that stains. You're nothing to me."

Just pretend Lovino didn't say that out loud.

After calming his embarrassed blush down he turned his attention to the Sleeping Idiot Trio. He should probably move Antonio first, since he was closest and all. Lovi walked over to the Spaniard, dodging bottles and cans and other questionable things. He flipped Antonio over so his face was no longer smothered into the cream colored couch and he then easily pulled him up onto the couch. His head lolled back and some random words escaped his mouth. Antonio talked in his sleep; it was very interesting to watch. Not that Lovino watch Antonio when he slept. That was just creepy. And Lovino was not a creeper.

"N-no Mr. Turtle I don't l-love Tomato more then you." Lovino heard Antonio mumble. He had to control a blush that was ready to spring up. Not because Antonio looked really cute or anything. Because it was hot in there.

Lovino shook his head and turned to Gilbert, who was snoring in a really strange way, like he was saying 'kesesese'. Lovi scowled and walked over to him. He lightly place his feet on Gilbert and yanked on his arms. Gilbert body stood up before falling on the smaller Italian man. Usually such a weight and height difference would make it difficult to move someone. But Lovino had much practice moving the three drinkers it was now like second nature. So he easily had Gilbert sitting on the couch next to Antonio. Then all there was left was Francis. Lovi approached to French man cautiously. It was, yet at the same time not at all, surprising how many times he had been grouped by the sleeping hands. Lovino gulped, he saw no other way. He had to pick Francis up. He moved closer and using every bit of his strength scooped the French man up into his arms. Lovino huffed as he stumbled to the couch and dropped him next to Gilbert. He froze for a second in fear that Francis would wake up. Yet all he did was let out a creepy 'ohonhonhon' sound. Lovi shivered and backed away from the pervert.

Now that the Sleeping Idiot Trio was taken care of Lovino wondered what he should do next. Finally he shrugged and began to collect all of the shot glasses and mugs. He piled them up in the kitchen and began to the clean them all. He washed them all in nice hot soapy water, rinsed them, dried them, and stacked them nicely in the cupboards. With that done he dried his hands and grabbed some garbage bags. It was time to pick up the rest of the cans and bottles. Lovino walked out into the living room and began to pile up the trash. Suddenly he heard a groan. Lovino's head snapped towards the couch. He saw Gilbert shift a bit and slowly open his eyes. Crap, why did it always have to be Gilbert that woke up. Lovino bit his lip. At least he had a plan.

"wh-wha? Lovino wa you doin'? Are ya cleanin'?" Gilbert asked drowsily.

"Ah Gilly, you silly goose. Why are you awake?" Lovino put an award winning smile and raised his voice a bit. He placed his hand on his hips and pouted cutely.

"Wha?"

"Don't worry Gilly! I've got it all taken care of. You can go back to sleep hun." Lovino add a high pitched giggle in just in case.

Gilbert blinked a few times before putting a hand to his forehead.

"How much did I drink last night?" Never the less he closed his eyes and was fast asleep in no time.

Lovino stayed still for a while. It wasn't until Gilbert started his weird 'Kesese'ing snore did he move again. He need to do this faster, he didn't know when the trio would start waking up for real. Lovi quickly continued to sort and bag the bottles and cans. After that he cleaned up the stains, changed the curtains, replaced the lamp, straitened up the chair, and he folded up all the blankets and pillow they had gotten out. Lovino observed the now strait and clean living room with a proud smirk when something caught his eye. He turned to the couch and walked closer and saw it. The Sleeping Idiot Trio's faces were covered with dried alcohol. Romano clicked his tongue and shook his head before running to the kitchen to get a wash cloth. When it was wet he ran back to the idiots. He gently took Antonio's faces and softly washed the sticky alcohol off. The dried drinks flaked off well, but the sticky leftovers took a while to get off. Lovino rubbed vigorously, yet softly enough not to hurt Antonio. He did the same for Gilbert and Francis. Lovino had to take extra time on Gilbert; he had gotten the beer in his hair. He clicked his tongue softly in what seemed like disappointment. When he was done he stepped back and smiled tenderly.

Then he realized what he had just done. His face exploded into a tomato red and he forced his scowl to fall back in place. He felt like hiding in the corner and dying of embarrassment. At least no one saw him. Lovino sighed once more before turning to head back to his room. He looked back at the trio. And then at the blankets he had folded. Lovino bit his lip. He ran over to the pile and grabbed a blanket. He walked back over to the trio and laid it over them, tucking them in. Just in case it got cold. Not that he cared. Cause he didn't. Not at all.

When Antonio opened his eyes they first thing he realized was that it was bright out, and that his head hurt. Really bad. Antonio groaned and pulled the covers over his head. Wait covers. Antonio didn't remember getting any blankets. Not that he remember much about last night anyway. He pulled the blanket off his head and looked around. The room was so clean! Oh, they must have cleaned the room before they passes out. Antonio always wondered why Lovi hated having his friends over for drinks. Lovi said that it was because they always trashed the place. But that wasn't true. It's always really, really clean when they woke up, so they must have not trashed it or cleaned it up. Antonio heard his two friends groan next to him.

"Hey guys, look how good we cleaned the room." Antonio said cheerily, ignoring the pounding in his head. "If Lovi see's it like this maybe he won't have problems with you two drinking here anymore."

"I don't think we should drink at your house anymore Toni." Gil grumbled.

"Why?"

"Because when we do I always dream of Lovino shirtless and in an apron. And he's always cleaning with a creepy big smile on his face."

"…"

"Lucky."

_Fail ending. I just wanted Gilbert to talk about a shirtless Lovi in an apron, which sounds really awesome. I got this idea from comic-y thing I saw with Romano putting a blanket over the passed out BTT. And I once read a head cannon where Roma was a mother hen type of person and I now believe it. So, badda bing badda boom it was born. C:_

_Oh and sorry for the strange title. I made this up at like three in the morning. _

_Review n' Stuff please. _


End file.
